The Lord’s Prayer: Who’s Your Daddy?

• Matthew 6:7-15 - read this passage online here »

One day, a young boy asked his grandmother if he was a child of God. “Why, of course you are,” she replied. He looked puzzled and then responded, “Well I had better tell Mom and Dad -- they think I'm theirs!”

Who’s your daddy?

In the 1998 Disney movie Parent Trap, identical twins who were separated at birth by their parents' divorce accidentally meet 11 years later at summer camp. Together the twins plan to switch identities so each can meet the respective parent she's never known and try to bring their parents together again.

As Annie, who is pretending to be Hallie, disembarks from her plane, her father is waiting for her. Annie is tentative but exuberant as she sees him.

“Get into these arms, you little punk!” her dad says.

She runs to embrace him with a big smile, saying, “Dad! Finally!” The father tells her he has missed her and a lot has been happening. Annie responds: “A lot's been happening to me too, Dad. I mean, I feel I'm practically a new woman!”

As they're walking to the car, the father notices that Annie – who he thinks is Hallie -- can't stop looking at him and asks: “What? Did I cut myself shaving?”

Annie answers: “No. It's just seeing you for the first time. I mean, you know, in so long.”

As they drive toward his home, Annie discusses the camp, ending almost all her sentences with the word “Dad.” He asks her, “Why do you keep saying 'Dad' at the end of every sentence?”

Annie answers: “I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was doing it, Dad. Sorry, Dad.” They both laugh. “Do you want to know why I keep saying 'Dad'? The truth?”

The father says, “Because you missed your old man so much, right?”

“Exactly. It's because in my whole life -- I mean, you know, for the past eight weeks -- I was never able to say the word 'Dad.' Never. Not once. And if you ask me, a dad is an irreplaceable person in a girl's life. Think about it. There's a whole day devoted to celebrating fathers. Just imagine someone's life without a father. Never buying a Father's Day card. Never sitting on their father's lap. Or being able to say 'Hi Dad' or 'What's up, Dad?' or 'Catch you later, Dad.' I mean, a baby's first words are always 'Dada,' aren't they?”

The father asks: “Let me see if I get this. You missed being able to call me 'Dad'?”

Annie answers, “Yeah, I really have, Dad.”

Who’s your daddy?

Jesus understood the deep yearnings of his disciples to pray – even to pray properly. What do we say? Is there a right way to say our prayers? Jesus says that, when we pray, we are to closet ourselves away –or find a quiet spot by ourselves -- so we can connect with God the Father alone and not make a theatrical production of our personal devotion before the world. Jesus also says that, when we pray, we don’t need to say special magical words or special spiritual words. And we don’t need to be repetitive and long-winded with God. We just need to be real and honest and open with God. I appreciate how The Message Bible in Matthew 6:7-9 introduces Jesus’ teaching on how to pray:

“The world is full of so-called prayer warriors who are prayer-ignorant. They’re full of formulas and programs and advice, peddling techniques for getting what you want from God. Don’t fall for that nonsense. This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. With a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply. Like this: Our Father in heaven …” [Italics are mine.]

Our world abounds with many names for God. For instance, Hinduism has more than 330 million gods that they call aspects of the Supreme Being. Islam speaks of the 99 beautiful names of Allah. However, Jesus’ name for God is strikingly simple and uncomplicated: “Father.” In teaching us how to pray, Jesus invites us to pray very simply: “Our Father.”

“Our Father” – two simple words that need some unpacking.

First, “Father.” Jesus uses the Aramaic word – abba -- for “Father.” Children, young and old, used that intimate term for their fathers. It comes close to the way children in many languages refer to their fathers even today. Note the sounds ab-ba. Don’t they sound like papa, dada, daddy, for instance? Abba is a word filled with love and affection that theologian Dale Bruner says “is the most warm of [all] the Aramaic words for father.” What also intrigues me is that abba was never too childish to say. When children grew up, they still affectionately called their fathers abba. So when Jesus says abba, his disciples recognized the word. But they probably would have been startled by Jesus using such a familiar and affectionate name in praying to God. Yet this is an important issue in the way Jesus teaches his disciples (and us) how to pray. He teaches us prayer is personal. For Jesus, prayer is not depersonalized techniques and formulas to get God’s attention. Prayer to God is personal because God is personal -- even like a good father!

In the how-not-to-pray verses leading up to his prayer, Jesus calls God “Father” three times. In the Sermon on the Mount as a whole (Matthew 5, 6 and 7), Jesus uses the word “Father” 15 times! In 10 of those instances, Jesus expanded “Father” to include “Father in heaven” or “heavenly Father.” As Eugene Peterson, author of The Message Bible wrote: “Get used to this: Father.... ‘Father’ is Jesus’ metaphor of choice for God.” [Eugene Peterson, Tell It Slant: A Conversation on the Language of Jesus in His Stories and Prayers, Eerdmans, 2008, p. 169]

Who’s your daddy?

For various reasons, some people have difficulty addressing God as “Father.” It may be because they have issues with their own fathers. Their fathers may have been emotionally or physically abusive or emotionally cold or verbally harsh. Or these so-called fathers may have been absent for much of their children’s lives --walking away from the family and leaving only the mother to bring up the children. And also, do we not live in a North American entertainment culture that more often parodies fathers than encourages their presence? Now I am not convinced the best remedy for a bad father is no father at all. When I say this, I am not saying an abusive father ought to be endured and remain in a family. But does it not make sense to intentionally encourage the gifts of a good father and teach and model the character of a responsible provider, a caring guardian, a compassionate and loving husband? Jesus gives us such a gift when he teaches us to pray “Our Father ... ”

The Lord’s Prayer is located almost exactly in the middle of the Sermon on the Mount, which encompasses chapters 5, 6 and 7 of the Gospel of Matthew. It is as if this prayer is the support beam upon which the rest of Jesus’ teachings in the Sermon finds balance. Without this prayer, Jesus’ teachings and way of living with his disciples would not have happened in the manner Jesus and his Father dearly desired. If there is no prayer to a loving and compassionate Father at the centre, Jesus’ teachings are like a dry code of lifeless ethics.

Second, in teaching us how to pray, Jesus says to pray “Our Father.” The pronoun “our” is significant.

This is the only place in the Gospels where Jesus says “Our Father.” In other places, Jesus always talks intimately of “my Father” or in an absolute manner of “the Father.” When he talks to the disciples, he usually speaks of “your Father.” For instance, even after his resurrection, Jesus tells Mary Magdalene, “Go, tell the disciples, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’” The meaning of his distinction between “my” and “your” becomes clear when we think in the following manner (which, by the way, is a way to think theologically). The church has confessed down through its history that Jesus, our Lord, is God’s only Son. You might remember hearing John 3:16 as a child in the traditional King James Version: “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son.” Jesus’ relation to God the Father is absolutely unique. He -- and he alone -- is God’s Son by nature. That is the intent of Jesus being the only begotten Son of the Father. Christians are God’s children by grace – the grace of adoption (John 1:12). And all people are God’s children by virtue of creation (Acts 17:28-29). Jesus, and Jesus alone, is God’s Son by right.

So when Jesus connects with us and calls the Father “Our Father,” he gives us a remarkable and wonderful gift. He is passing on to us something of his personal and priceless relationship with his Father. Jesus is saying God is our Father too! It is the kind of relationship that we can have with God as well -- to which I say, Thanks be to God!

When we pray to the Father, Jesus is also connecting himself with us. We are praying together with him. We are living our life together with him. Jesus is not disconnected from our praise and our honour of God or from our desire to do what God our Father wills. Jesus is not disconnected from our experience of what we need, whether regarding physical sustenance or spiritual nourishment. Jesus also knows what it means to forgive others. Jesus understands our desire not to be tested too hard. In teaching us to say “Our Father,” Jesus connects with us in our experience of the daily grind of our lives. All of these things are focused in the rest of the Lord’s Prayer. But that’s for the next several messages.

We are connected with Jesus and we are connected with one another when we pray “Our Father.” When we say “our,” we place ourselves with Jesus and with all who pray. We are never alone when we pray. We are with Jesus and with all others who love and follow him. That’s why I believe our church’s small group called the OYM Prayer Supporters is a significant ministry among us. The group symbolizes our prayerful concerns and connections with one another. When they pray for us, when we pray for one another, we are not alone. Thanks be to God “Our Father!”

Who’s your daddy?

John W. Fountain is a professor of journalism at the University of Illinois. He was formerly a national correspondent for the New York Times. The National Public Radio runs a series called “This I Believe.” As part of the series, Fountain gave the following testimony [Excerpted from “The God Who Embraced Me,” All Things Considered, www.npr.org (posted 11-28-2005)]:

“I believe in God. Not that cosmic, intangible spirit-in-the-sky that Mama told me as a little boy ‘always was and always will be.’ But the God who embraced me when Daddy disappeared from our lives -- from my life at age four -- the night police led him down the stairs, away from our front door, in handcuffs. The God who warmed me when we could see our breath inside our freezing apartment, when the gas was disconnected in the dead of another wind-whipped Chicago winter, and there was no food, little hope and no hot water.

“The God who held my hand when I witnessed boys in my 'hood swallowed by the elements, by death and by hopelessness; [the God] who claimed me when I felt like ‘no-man's son,’ amid the absence of any man to wrap his arms around me and tell me, ‘Everything's going to be okay,’ to speak proudly of me, to call me son.

“I believe in God, God the Father, embodied in his Son Jesus Christ. The God who allowed me to feel his presence -- whether by the warmth that filled my belly like hot chocolate on a cold afternoon, or that voice, whenever I found myself in the tempest of life's storms, telling me (even when I was told I was ‘nothing’) that I was something, that I was his, and that even amid the desertion of the man who gave me his name and DNA and little else, I might find [in God] sustenance.

“I believe in God, the God who I have come to know as Father, as Abba -- Daddy.

[Fountain also said:] “It wasn't until many years later, standing over my father's grave for a conversation long overdue, that my tears flowed. I told him about the man I had become. I told him about how much I wished he had been in my life. And I realized fully that, in his absence, I had found Another. Or that he -- God the Father, God my Father -- had found me.”

My friends, may the personal knowledge of God as our loving heavenly Father also be so for you and for me. Amen.

Rev. Chris Miller
January 16, 2011

oympastor@rogers.com

OYM Oriole-York Mills United Church, Toronto

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